Take my life.

Today's a gloomy day for me. I haven't slept well in so long, I'm weary, worn down, heavy hearted, lonely and lost. I've been thinking a lot about our discussion on Monday at small group. I've been thinking a lot about my life and my marriage and our future. It's been hard {life and marriage, seeing, following and obeying God's plan}. I don't know what the next step is for us. Should I look for a completely new job? Should I take on another job to help pay loans and save for a house? Should I just stop trying? Should I give up my plans, lower expectations? Should we move back to Cedarville and Eugene go back to school?

Like I said, I'm feeling basically lost. But I know God will come through for me. He always does. I'm just fading fast. I can literally feel the devil pulling me down. Last night, I laid in bed wanting to just give up, run away alone, and escape. That's not godliness. I will continue to cling to the hope I have in Jesus. I will fight fear and remember praise today.

I'm putting this song on repeat, and lifting the lyrics up as my prayer. He is in control {I say with shaking hands}. He is in control. He is in control. He always comes through.





Take my life and let it be

consecrated, Lord, to Thee.
Take my moments and my days,
let them flow in ceaseless praise.
Take my hands and let them move
at the impulse of Thy love.
Take my feet and let them be
swift and beautiful for Thee.


Take my voice and let me sing
always, only for my King.
Take my lips and let them be
filled with messages from Thee.
Take my silver and my gold
not a mite would I withhold.
Take my intellect and use
every power as You choose.


::Chorus::
Here am I, all of me.
Take my life, it's all for Thee.


Take my will and make it Thine
it shall be no longer mine.
Take my heart it is Thine own
it shall be Thy royal throne.
Take my love, my Lord I pour
at Your feet its treasure store
Take myself and I will be
ever, only, all for Thee.


Take myself and I will be
ever, only, all for Thee.
Here am I, all of me.
Take my life, it's all for Thee.
(Take my life, Lord take my life. Take all of me)
Here am I, all of me.
Take my life, it's all for Thee.

xoxo,

Jane